She still loves Eugene, he's still one of her best friends, but she will never trust him again the way she did when she thought she was escorting him across the country to save the world; she will never trust anyone that way, not if she has a say. Even Jesus makes her nervous sometimes, Jesus who has never given her reason to doubt him and who got in just under the wire before Abraham trashed the cornerstone of her confidence the way only someone she loves can.

She pinches the bridge of her nose, hard, and smears away the dampness she finds there. She's turned sideways in the chair by now, barely staying in it, one foot drawn up onto it so she's smaller and harder to hit.

"They made me feel like nothing. Like no matter what I did, how good I was, I would always be nothing. I'm not nothing. And whoever's fault it is, I won't ever let anyone make me feel like that again." She won't ever let anyone that close again.